Oh lord, I was looking at different page layouts, and sure enough, I lost the layout Zia created for me, as well as half of my writing. I am so frustrated.
That's me and the computer. I lose things and I could just cry. Just cry, cry, cry. I am just not good with computers-or technical things! And this is how everyone communicates today, Facebook, blogging, tweeting, no calling. It feels strange and unfamiliar writing on this color background. I guess that is how we all feel in our lives when old schools are torn down, malls are built, jobs removed, children go off to college.
I met Sidney, she'd been to an Ashram in the Bahamas. She said she spent the week meditating, chanting, doing yoga 4 hours a day. Her skin looked terrific and she seemed very peaceful. She said that there are two ways to look at your life, one is horizontal-what schools, what job, what money we have, and the other one is spiritual, where we are at in our spiritual development, which actually, is all we have in the end.
We talked about Jordan's father coming in to see the twins for the first time. He had a meeting in NY, and so he was going to drop by and see them.
Sidney said how she went with 3 other mothers, all of whom were working full time jobs and running their households. The men, even if they stayed at home, were simply not capable of double tasking the way women were.
I said that is the nature of being a woman, a mother, a working mother, forever divided, never feeling there is enough of you.
I am supposed to be looking for a nanny. I have no idea who will fill the bill. We have one nanny we love, but she wants $900 a week, and that's simply out of Jordan's range. Yesterday we were dividing the loft room into sections, and the middle one was going to be for the twins to play.
On the spiritual side, I am trying to stay awake and be coherent. IO will push no one but myself.
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